Dear My Future Self,
I hope that in___ you are healthier and happier. I hope you meet your goals and become a better person in the present.
Yours Truly,
Your Past Self
Do you ever wonder what your life “could have been?”
My life could have been ___ if this ___ did not happen or
If only I did _____ my life would have been different.
Bull crap.
- It is never too late to chase after the things you want.
So what? Now that an opportunity slipped away, you are going to wait for another opportunity to show up? Stop trying to validate yourself and go after the things you want.
Now how do you chase after the things you want? The things that are way out of your comfort zone, but you know they would be good for you.
Here’s an example of mine:
In 9th grade, I wanted to try out for track, but was hesitant, because I was scared of what the other runners would think about me and if they would want me to be their friend. As a result, I never joined the team.
Looking back, I was very afraid of these athletes, who have trained, and what I did not notice was that I was comparing my first day of training to someone’s 100th day of training. Our levels of running were inevitably going to have a significant difference.
Regretting to join track in 9th grade, I felt that there was no use to try out in 10th grade. But on the last week to sign up, I quickly filled out the forms and just did it spontaneously.
The point of this story is that everything is about mindset. So what if you fall, you get back up. Fear is the signal to success and same goes with failure.
Now how do you implement a good mindset?
Step 1: Surround yourself with motivating friends & family
Ever had a conversation with someone who made you smile and happy, that is the person you want to talk to. In the next step, I will teach you how to meet new people and become friends.
Step 2: Journal
Figure out your strengths and weaknesses.
Are you sensitive, cocky, optimistic, caring, manipulative, or daring?
Here’s a list of questions to ask yourself:
- What makes you smile?
- What makes you angry?
- Where do you want to be 5 years from now?
- What are your 3 long term goals from now?
- How do you want to be perceived?
Why are we journaling? Journaling is a fantastic way to learn more about yourself and is helpful in prioritizing activities.
Step 3: Create a Pros and Cons Chart
First write down your goals, because you are 42% more likely to achieve your goals if you write them down! The goals can be long term or short term.
Now write the positives and negatives of these goals to weigh whether or not your goal is worth it.
Ex: Goal- I want to create a YouTube Channel
Pros:
- able to express creativity
- a passion
- fun
Cons:
- difficult to get a following
- time consuming
After counting which one has the greater number: if more positives go for your goal and if negatives drop it. This method has helped me find an easier solution to my indecisiveness. But as always follow your heart and mind. Don’t just follow your heart, because what if the activity ends up being time consuming and you don’t enjoy it anymore. As well as what if you follow your mind, because then your grades begin to drop since your hobby/goal is too time consuming.
Here’s an extra tip if the positives and negatives are tied.
I search up “ flip a coin” or I get an actual coin to flip.
Heads: I do it.
Tails: I don’t.
Only flip the coin once, because if you do it three times you may be trying to avoid heads or tails as much as possible. (ex: you are too scared to join the track team, so you decide to flip a coin and you get heads. You don’t want heads, because you are too scared and tell yourself, “just two more flips, best out of three wins.”← this is the incorrect way of thinking
Too scared? That’s the signal you are looking for.
Fear.
follow your fears, because you will be satisfied in the long term.
2. Make Friends
Making friends can be difficult or easy depending on your personality.
I will discuss ways I use to talk to people. Since the pandemic, many people have lost contact with their friends, so here is how I still managed to make new friends despite COVID-19 (safely making friends).
Mutual Friends are the best way to go.
Mutual friends not only guarantee no cat-fishing, but a general understanding of each other. In September 2020, someone requested me on instagram. I texted the person, “Who are you?” I was not too sure who this person was, but this person felt familiar. But I had mistaken this person and instead of declining request, I started a conversation with this person. This person was a mutual friend of mine and we remain friends till this day.
Now it is not easy to find someone, who is willing to talk to you out of the blue, so do not expect people to continue a conversation.
But the moral of the story is to take initiative and release positive energy.
When someone releases positive energy, people try to match up with the mood. So if you want to make more friends, you have to reach out to people.
I could have declined the request.
I could have stopped the conversation after I mistaken this person, but instead I introduced myself.
Catch up with old classmates or friends
Message them on social media and strike up a conversation by saying, “hey! It’s been a while. How are you doing? What have you been doing the last couple of weeks/months/years?”
The key point is do not make it awkward.
When I was younger one of my teachers said, “Remember, something is only awkward if you make it awkward.”
So let’s say they reply with little to none context. Try to bring up some interests they have or say you guys have the same teacher talk about the class etc.
Make sure to find the right balance of time for your friends and yourself.
3. Confidence
Confidence is the key to make you feel good.
Say positive things to yourself everyday.
“I love myself.”
“You look great.”
“I am so proud of you.”
To see results, you must look in the mirror.
Find your style and look for clothes that make you feel good.
Eat food that makes your body feel good and workout until your body sweats!
Now that you have learned the three key factors to make every year your year. Remember balance. Balance with a social life, inner self, and more.
Keep yourself accountable by finding someone who can keep you in check. If you want more assurance, comment on this article and I will keep you accountable.
I challenge you to make 2021 your year.